Well hello, people! It's me! The crotchety reclusive INTJ in the mismatched socks! Welcome to a new day and another year of chaos! May we all fondly remember how depressed we were this time last year. (Not much has changed.) The last twelve months have been a whopper of an adventure, from getting employed for [...]
Greetings, peasants. If by some misfortune you missed the last two posts in this series, I highly recommend catching up. (Or don't. Whatever.) To summarize – Anna got herself engaged to a fairly awesome horrible guy, and we subsequently failed as wedding planners. {Part 1} {Part 2} The week before the wedding, people started trickling [...]
Welcome back to the next installment of my sister's strange wedding story! If you haven't read Part 1, do so here. To summarize— Anna fell in love with a bearded dude and agreed to renounce her family's name in exchange for his. And I was not at all bitter. I will admit, I'd always imagined [...]
Last year was weird. You saw the weirdness take shape in the form of germs and unflattering headgear and that time everyone was really enthusiastic about toilet paper, and all those insulting signs that assumed none of us knew the most basic principles of hygiene. I, on the other hand, came face to face with [...]
I recognize that no one cares, and thus I will forego the anticipated jokes about hindsight being 2020 and WWIII. Friends, we're alive. And despite the fact that the world's imminent implosion is beginning to look less like a joke and more like reality, I'd just like to say that neither rain, shine, nor communism [...]
Top o' the morning to ya, friends! Guess whose birthday is in two days? *gasp* Me! My birthday is in two days! (If you said Benedict Cumberbatch, you are also correct, but between the two of us I'm clearly more important.) Birthdays aside, be ye warned -- this post has neither structure or purpose. It [...]
Note: This post is a random conglomeration of stories from work. If you haven’t read the previous post about my job, I suggest doing some quick cramming, 'cause I ain’t going to explain it again. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, too bad for you. Here’s the link. Another Note: I tried really [...]
I think we’ve had enough of it plastered across every headline, conversation, text message, social media post, blog post, lamppost, fencepost, whipping post, and every other post in existence. Friends, I come bearing glad tidings of joy in these troubled times: Believe it or not, I am one of those rare people who actually knows [...]
Well hello, my minions! Guess where I've been?? That be the March for Life. Shout-out to the guy in the bottom-right corner who was disturbed by me randomly taking his picture. So here's how it happened: We were at church one day, talking about it with a friend of ours. A local Pro-Life organization [...]
Before I welcome myself back and gush about the new year, I'd like to issue a formal apology for using the word "rad" in my post's title. Do I like the word rad? No. Is it a redundant word that should be eradicated (*coughs* eRADicated... okay now I hate myself) from the English language? Absolutely. [...]
The Sarcastic Elf 