Whaaaat, who's this interrupting your Thursday? Oh look -- it's me!! Yeah, okay. I have several announcements. First, I finally bought my internet domain! Yes, gone are the days of WordPress creepin' on my blog address and ads about feet. This shipwreck is the thesarcasticelf.COM now, and I'm monstrously proud of my baby. [...]
My friends, I come as a herald of happy things and sad things, great joy and exponential tragedy. The happy thing is that kittens exist. The sad thing is that I don't have it in me to write a blog post. "Whoa, whoa, Sarah, it's already been two weeks. You're skipping AGAIN?!?!" ...make me feel [...]
"Guys, lets go to a rodeo," I said to my family one day. "Bullriding is a sport where people almost get trampled, and I want to see it." My family is well schooled in the ways of a writer and didn't bother raising their eyebrows. They even humored me, finding a nearby rodeo and the [...]
Do you like stage plays? *glares* DO YOU??? When I was 14, my aunt took Anna and I to see a production of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe touring in the area. Being my highly skeptical *cough* pessimistic *cough cough* self, I didn't expect much. Because... magic! Talking animals! Child actors! LIONS! How [...]
Well hello, my friends! Guess who's going to see a play of The Horse and His Boy tomorrow! What's that, you say? I'm going to see a play of The Horse and His Boy tomorrow??? How shockingly astute of you. I'm currently holed up in a quiet corner of my aunt's basement, counting the seconds [...]
Well folks, today is special. Today, on the 19th of 2019, I turn— 18. I know. I was disappointed about that too. Two years ago, I wrote a post commemorating my 16th birthday. The majority of it was spent rambling about the responsibilities of growing up, how frightening it was to be the age of [...]
Once upon a time, there was a writer who actually had friends. (It wasn't me.) And seeing as this writer had just turned 20, her friends (who lived in various corners of the world) decided to converge on her when she was least expecting it and celebrate with her in person. Thus, I (and a [...]
G'day, people! While I have all manner of exciting life updates I can't wait to fill you in on, I've decided to save them for another time. Today, I want to direct your attention to a fascinating comment I received on my latest art post: And by golly, is that a challenge? Because I'm taking [...]
Guys, I'm not gonna lie: Life is pretty great right now. I know, I know, I just spent five weeks agonizing over some silly graduation, and before that, flipping out over basic social interactions and the price of eggs. The world is morbid and dark and determined to be miserable, and as a cynical INTJ, [...]
Ah yes, it's that time again. The time for random unscheduled Monday posts. The time for scattered thoughts and ink-stained fingers. The time for sheer insanity. The time when Sarah Baran starts tooting her own horn and blatantly self-advertising. Folks, Camp Nanowrimo starts in a week. Despite the fact that I've barely gotten over the [...]
