Greetings one and all, friends, comrades, and very large moths! Back in May, a Christian conference was being held in North Carolina with some of my family’s favorite speakers, like Paul Washer and Scott Brown and all those other fellows no one’s heard of before. Due to an insidious evil known as “work,” my dad [...]
Well hello, people! It's me! The crotchety reclusive INTJ in the mismatched socks! Welcome to a new day and another year of chaos! May we all fondly remember how depressed we were this time last year. (Not much has changed.) The last twelve months have been a whopper of an adventure, from getting employed for [...]
I haven’t thrown art at you since August. I wanna throw art. Can I throw art? I’m gonna throw art. (To be totally honest, I can’t remember if I’ve shared any of these or not, and most of them are posted on my Instagram anyway. So if you’ve already seen these, my apologies. You don’t [...]
Greetings, peasants. If by some misfortune you missed the last two posts in this series, I highly recommend catching up. (Or don't. Whatever.) To summarize – Anna got herself engaged to a fairly awesome horrible guy, and we subsequently failed as wedding planners. {Part 1} {Part 2} The week before the wedding, people started trickling [...]
Welcome back to the next installment of my sister's strange wedding story! If you haven't read Part 1, do so here. To summarize— Anna fell in love with a bearded dude and agreed to renounce her family's name in exchange for his. And I was not at all bitter. I will admit, I'd always imagined [...]
Last year was weird. You saw the weirdness take shape in the form of germs and unflattering headgear and that time everyone was really enthusiastic about toilet paper, and all those insulting signs that assumed none of us knew the most basic principles of hygiene. I, on the other hand, came face to face with [...]
Do you know what hiraeth means? It's a longing, a desperate search for a place that doesn't exist anymore, and maybe never did. When I was young, I felt it for the worlds between pages I held so dear – Narnia, Middle-Earth, the Ashtown estate. When I was older, I felt it for my worlds, [...]
I recognize that no one cares, and thus I will forego the anticipated jokes about hindsight being 2020 and WWIII. Friends, we're alive. And despite the fact that the world's imminent implosion is beginning to look less like a joke and more like reality, I'd just like to say that neither rain, shine, nor communism [...]
Ah, 2020. The year from the void. Over the past week, I've seen so many people laugh about shaking the dust of it off their feet as they charge into the New Year, hoping 2021 brings them better luck than its unfortunate predecessor. That makes me sad. No, I'm not going to enrage the population [...]
No one in the history of ever has wanted to be a horrible artist. Regardless, I'm still going to teach you. (You can thank me later.) In all honesty, my dear naive padawan, this is really just a prolonged and interminable sales pitch to try and connive you into buying my art, because yes, I'm [...]
The Sarcastic Elf 